Inlaid Text (00:00:02)

Foster care is a government program that places children with temporary caregivers if their biological families are unable to provide for their needs. This is usually as a result of abuse of neglect. Filming with foster children requires permission from a judge. This permission is rarely granted, so their experiences usually remain hidden.

Band Director (00:00:22):

Deep breath in. 5, 6, 7, 8. And in. And in. Exhale.

Alex (00:01:00):

I remember one time my social worker had come to see me at Boys and Girls Club. And a girl from my school had asked, who was that? Was that your dad? I said, no, that's my social worker. She said, why did you do something? And I said, no. And it just really bothered me. People assume that if you're in a foster home, that you did something, you do things that are illegal. Like you do crimes. You're a bad kid. You're not smart. Like that's not the case. Sometimes it's way out of their control. Sometimes they're just in a foster home because their parents couldn't take care of them. Honestly, I think being labeled a foster child isn't a good thing. It gives other children the right to separate themselves from you, not the right, but it gives them the opportunity to do that because you're not like us. And hearing other people call them no good or call them dumb or idiots because they're in a foster home and it's not even their fault makes that much worse.

Title Card (00:02:33)

POSSIBLE SELVES

Paige Fern Chan (00:02:52):

Foster youth are normal youth. They're teenagers when they get to high school. The problem is once we get to high school, that's when you see the spike and instability for foster youth, right? Because they're going through teenage angst and puberty and, and they're changing. They're defining who they are as a human being. And that's really hard for foster parents who aren't used to that to have to adjust, right? Who, if the youth is having a bad day to not say, you know what? I don't wanna deal with your bad day or your changing emotions. I'm just gonna say you go to a new foster home. Our foster youth moves schools an average of eight times while they're in care, and it's not just moving schools, it's new teachers, new friends, you don't have the school uniform, you don't have the clothes that everyone else is wearing. Foster youth are the only sort of underprivileged population that doesn't have a right to speak out on their own behalf. So I think having the United States and the country understand what these youth are facing, but also hearing it from them is something that hasn't been done.

Alex (00:04:25):

Notice anything different?

Sue (00:04:26):

You had a shave. It’s nice to see your face.

Alex (00:04:29):

Can you help me?

Sue (00:04:31):

It’s probably easier, wait let me do it. Here you go, turn around.

Alex (00:04:38):

I was kind of upset about not being able to do anything really for my birthday. So, the band teacher was telling us that you have to wear your tux with some, like Christmas accessories. And I raised my hand and I said, oh, well, what if I have a Santa outfit? And he is like, well, we could talk after class. It's like, yeah, it's my birthday. And I'd rather be wearing the Santa outfit. And so he just said, okay, after a while.

Alex (00:05:06):

Sue, this beard smells funny.

Sue (00:05:10):

Oh dear. Should we brush it?

Alex (00:05:12):

No, please.

Sue (00:05:14):

Can you brush it?

Alex (00:05:15):

No, I don't think so.

Sue (00:05:18):

Mmm. It's lovely. Let me Febreeze it.

Alex (00:05:23):

Don't Febreeze it.

Sue (00:05:25):

Yeah. It’ll stop it from smelling.

Alex (00:05:28):

Is there a little hole now?

Sue (00:05:29):

Oh man.

Alex (00:05:30):

Yeah, that smells really bad.

Alex (00:05:32):

No. Will, you can't do it yourself. It's bad. Well, you could do it yourself, but there you go.

Sue (00:05:42):

Alex, do you mind if I trim this just a bit? Just so you can breathe.

Alex (00:05:48):

Does it clear an opening for my mouthpiece? Cool.

Sue (00:05:54):

I am multi-talented, right? I honestly, I think that's the best. You look fabulous.

Alex (00:06:02):

Thank you.

Sue (00:06:03):

Right. Are we ready? You ready?

Sue (00:06:08):

If, um, you want me to bring a change of clothes? For the performance, just tell me.

Alex (00:06:13):

All right, I will.

Sue (00:06:14):

I just, I just think you're gonna be warm that’s all. Yeah. It’s at your feet. All right off you go.

Alex (00:06:21):

Okay. Bye Sue. Bye's I do. I get made fun of, do I just let the making-fun-of-ness happen?

Sue (00:06:30):

No, they’d be making fun of Christmas. So I don't think anyone will. I think you'll be alright.

Alex (00:06:32):

Oh, that’s true. Bye Shaun.

Shaun (00:06:32):

Bye guys.

Sue (00:06:35):

Bye babe. I will be up at the bleachers at the back.

Sue (00:06:51):

Alex came here with Will. And basically him and will were friends through the band. Will had a sleepover and a few of his friends stayed overnight and he was the kid who was helping clean up, you know.

Sue (00:07:07):

And he would sit and chat with me and Al. He started off in a foster home and then he went to a family living situation and it just didn't work out. And then he went to a group home and Will was actually really upset. And he said, you know, you are never gonna guess what's happened. He's ended up, now he's in a group home. I just looked at Al and I said, I just, I don't like the idea of him in a group home, you know? And so I said, you know, we've got an extra room. Why don't we just see if he wants to come here? We were still eating at the table and Will just texted him cuz that's kids. Do you wanna come and stay with us for a bit? And I saw the text. It was just a, yeah. And like a million exclamation points. He gave me the details of his social worker and I called her the next day. And it just went from there.

Alex (00:08:00):

It's more of a family atmosphere here than it is at the group home. I didn't even know any of this was gonna happen. Like me moving in with him or anything. I told him about this and he told his parents and his parents thought about it. And then they just told him one day, you know, we'll take him in. And so, you know, I'm always thankful for that. And Will's really nice and he's, he's always been a good friend of mine. The social worker came to see me and I turned this little card of hers into like a little stamp. Then let's see, I got this. When I was at the group home. Children’s Group Home Ombudsman or something like that. Did you see the wooden Cobra? These we're from a football game, but you could tell it's hand carved cuz you know they did, you could still see all the edges. It's not like a smooth finish. And uh, all of these are extremely uneven. I don't know. I still really like it. We got it from uh, Monterey beach. When I went, when I was like seven.

Inlaid text (00:09:14):

Alex has been accepted into the First Star Bruin Guardian Scholars Academy. The program helps foster teens get into college. Teens in the program receive mentorship, tutoring and counseling throughout their high school years. Each summer, they spend one month living in dorms on the UCLA campus.

Edwin (00:09:38)

I call top bunk.

Alex (00:09:39)

What? Alright.

Eric (00:09:41):

What if we wake up in the middle of the night and like, we gotta use it and like, what is we supposed to do? Is we supposed to just sit or we could go out by ourselves and go use it? Or we gonna be trouble?

Joseph (00:09:48):

They’ll be like, what's your name?

Willie  (00:09:49):

I ain't going out by myself.

Eric (00:09:50):

I know.

Willie (00:09:51):

It’s gonna be dark bro, like you ever see Paranormal Activity?

Eric (00:09:54):

They're gonna be like people with flashlights walking up and down.

Sarah (00:09:58):

Teesha, did you bring any CDs or no?

Teesha (00:10:03):

CDs? No.

Sarah (00:10:04):

Did you bring an aux cord?

Teesha (00:10:05):

No.

Sarah (00:10:06):

I'm just that awesome.

Teesha (00:10:10):

Have you heard of Pandora?

Sarah (00:10:11):

Yeah.

Teesha (00:10:12):

It's so much easier.

Sarah (00:10:14):

It is, but it's not as fun. Sleeping with Sirens and Never Shout Never. And Evanescence and Great Big World and Pierce the Veil.

Selvin (00:10:25):

And I brought my Bible. So I could read it at night. And I brought some extra books, just in case I get bored or something. Roll of the dice.

Nathaniel (00:10:51):

My charger’s too bulky.

Alex (00:10:54):

No, it's not.

Nathaniel (00:10:55):

Yeah, look.

Alex (00:11:01)

No, no, this will work.

Nathaniel (00:11:07)

Hey, it’s charging like that.

Alex (00:11:10):

You're welcome. It’s not even fully plugged in.

Peter Samuelson (00:11:15):

If you can hear me clap once. If you can see me, hear me, clap twice. You can hear me clap three times. So we are the Bruin Guardian Academy. We are a college prep program. Our goal during the years of high school is to get all of our youth ready so that they can know what is the best outcome for them educationally. And to make sure that the maximum number of our Bruin Guardian Scholars go to college of one kind or another.

Alex (00:12:05):

Basically. I'm one of six children, but I'm the lucky one. I was the only one not born addicted to some sort of drug. When my mom would always like, do drugs and all that. She used to like feed me so that I wouldn't bother her when she was like shooting heroin or something. We were going from apartment to apartment. We would never pay the rent. We would just sneak out the back. My mom finally got arrested and I was placed with my grandmother. That was a good thing, but a bad thing, cuz I was always yelled at by my stepdad and then things. Well, he wasn't really my stepdad, but he was just like the father figure I guess. He was always like yelling at me and things had started to get like physical right or physically abusive in my house. And I asked to leave because I didn't want it to get worse.

Justin (00:13:00):

It's like foster children are like, you know, damaged goods no one really wanted. And I don't know. Once I became one, it's like my whole perspective just shifted. And I was um, I didn't want to be damaged goods nobody wanted. And luckily I, someone did want me, but for a lot of people, that's not the case. And you know that if that's what everyone will think of a foster child, then how can they ever see the qualities that they possess? How can they ever see that they might be a great dancer or a gifted musician or uh, I don't know, a lawyer, a doctor just who can see the potential in a damaged good, really?

Andrea (00:13:49):

Ooh, smash. Eyebrows popping tonight. Pow.

Tiffany (00:13:54):

Ayyy!

Andrea (00:14:01):

Close your eyes. Don't squint. Just close them.

Tiffany (00:14:06):

You don’t have to yell at me.

Andrea (00:14:07):

You don't have to be extra. I’m about to get my artistry on.

Tiffany (00:14:11):

Being in foster care, people are always asking you things like how does it feel to be in foster care.

Andrea (00:14:19):

What do you mean?

Tiffany (00:14:20):

What is it like to be like, they treat it like it's some kind of disease like, like cancer or something. And when people ask you this, you kind of have in your mind already what you're gonna say. You're like, oh, you know, it sucks, but you know, I made it through. Or, oh, you know, it wasn't the greatest, but I'm not a victim of my circumstance.

Andrea (00:14:40):

We're not crazy. We're not all like, we not all have like, depressing lives.

Tiffany (00:14:46):

We're not like helpless. Like we're not like, oh, I'm a foster child and I can't do anything because I'm a foster child. I'm a ward of the court. And like, it's not like that. It's like, okay, I've been through some stuff. It is who I am. I gotta deal with it and live life. I hate when people like,

 

Andrea (00:15:09):

“How does that, how do you feel?”

Tiffany (00:15:10):

Yeah. You know, like I, how does, how does being in foster care make you different?

Andrea (00:15:14):

Like, well, for me, I just don't think about it. I live my life.

Tiffany (00:15:18):

Right. It's kind of one those things you just put in the back.

Andrea (00:15:21):

Way back. But when you bring it up, that's when it just all comes tumbling down.

Tiffany (00:15:20):

Yeah. It kind of sucks.

Alex (00:15:46):

Do you think you could put like a stripe down Caesar's back and pass him off as a skunk?

Shaun (00:16:03):

And so why are you guys painting?

Alan (00:16:06):

We're looking to sell this place and move to somewhere bigger. Um, it's mostly Alex's fault since he moved in. Everywhere's too small. No, no it’s not. We, um, now, now that we're permanent residents, we want to sell it and move. You see all this stuff on the ceiling now? Brown sort of splotches.

Alex (00:16:35):

Oh, that's from me.

Alan (00:16:36):

That's you?

 

Alex (00:16:38):

Yeah.

Alan (00:16:39):

That's not you, is it?

Alex (00:16:42):

Oh, okay.

Alan (00:16:43):

I'm not convinced it's you Alex,

Alex (00:16:47):

Are you sure? Right there? I just left a few more. I can go over with the paint brush though. Sorry, just cuz I was trying to get all the way to the little edge right here. And so it marked the top.

Alan (00:16:58):

Yea, you can’t do it with a roller Alex.

Alex (00:17:01)

Okay. Yeah.

Alan (00:17:03)

You have to do it with the brush. Does it look a similarish color?

Alex (00:17:14):

Yea, it’s perfect.

Sue (00:17:17):

What happened? What have you done?

Alex (00:17:18):

Nothing. Nothing.

Sue (00:17:19):

What broke?

Alex (00:17:20):

No, Sue, nothing broke.

Sue (00:17:24):

No, it's something.

Alex (00:17:25):

No Sue. There's nothing.

Sue (00:17:27):

I don’t trust you.

Alex (00:17:29):

You don't trust me. Sue?

Sue (00:17:30):

What have you done?

Alex (00:17:31):

I've done nothing.

Sue (00:17:32):

It's the floor.

Alex (00:17:33):

No, it's actually not the floor.

Sue (00:17:34):

Yeah. There is something.

Alex (00:17:35):

Yeah, there is.

Sue (00:17:37):

What? What? Oh the ceiling.

Alex (00:17:40):

What about the ceiling?

Sue (00:17:42):

Now we’ve got to repaint the ceiling.

Alex (00:17:43):

Wait, what?

Sue (00:17:44):

Did you get paint on the ceiling? Just there.

Alex (00:17:48):

No, there's no paint on the ceiling. What?

Sue (00:17:53):

I dunno, he’s bluffing.

Sue (00:17:55):

Alex has changed a little bit since moving in. We are really calm people. We don't argue. Well, we do, but we don't shout. We don't throw things. You know, we don't get drunk. I always say we are quiet people in a noisy world. And Alex has been in situations that have been really stressful.

Sue (00:18:26):

And the first time we had an argument, he told me that he hated me. I said, be careful. Those are really strong words. And think about whether you actually mean them. A little bit later he said, I understand if you want me to leave. And I said, no, of course not. That's what families do. They argue. And then they talk about it and then they apologize and get over it. Not leaving cuz we've had an argument. That's not how families work. You're stuck with us. You have to stay. But I don't think he's been through that. I think he's lived in just complete turmoil in his biological family's home. His grandma, it was her boyfriend who was very abusive to Alex. And yet he loves that person. He absolutely loves them and he wants to see them. And I really struggle with that because I want him to know this person, but they're not a good role model in his life. So it is a difficult situation to be in because I want to protect him from that man. His family, he just remembers so fondly. And even though awful things happened to him really, I mean he still has such a strong bond with them.

Inlaid text (00:19:59)

Fist Star Program UCLA Campus

Selvin (00:20:06):

I’m kinda nervous. But, I would do it.

Breanna (00:20:08)

You’re nervous? I am too.

Instructor (00:20:12):

Whenever you're ready you can ask “on belay.”

Selvin (00:20:16):

Yea, let’s do it.

Breanna (00:20:18)

Ready? On belay.

Group (00:20:20):

Belay on.

Breanna (00:20:21)

Climbing.

Group (00:20:20)

Climb on.

Instructor (00:20:22):

Alright, nice. Good job belayers.

Group (00:20:33):

Come on, Bri and Selvin. Y’all can do it. There you go. You’re halfway there. You got it. Almost there. Y’all got it now, kick it. Kick it, Selvin. Yea, go. Good job. There we go, good job y’all.

Deandre (00:21:32):

Selvin hates me cause I'm messy. You see all this, this is all me right here.

Selvin (00:21:42):

Have you ever been to juvie?

Deandre (00:21:43):

Yeah, man. I had to go for three months.

Selvin (00:21:47):

Why though? Like what did you do?

Deandre (00:21:49):

I was being intoxicated in public. Disturbing the peace and assault.

Selvin (00:21:55):

Damn. How was it though? Like how was cause I've been to juvie too, you know? So I mean how, how was it for you to be there? Like how did you handle it?

Deandre (00:22:02):

My first experience was like crazy man. Cuz like I couldn't take being by myself most of the time. And then there's basically what it was. It's just me, myself and I in this room. Did a lot of thinking. Stressed out sometimes like flipped out. Yeah man. I had some times where I just went crazy, started punching the wall, got in trouble cuz I couldn't take it anymore being in that room. Lot of things happen, man.

Selvin (00:22:30):

My first day I was like, you know, I was kind of like, I was looking out the window. Yeah. And you know how you know the window?

Deandre (00:22:37):

The one window. Yeah man.

Selvin (00:22:38):

So I was like, man, I wish I was outside. You know, I wish I could like feel the air, you know, the breeze and my skin, you know, I wish I could like, you know, walk, you know, but you can't really walk, you know.

Deandre (00:22:48):

You can’t do nothing bro. Like I miss views. Like when I came out yeah. Views were just crazy. Amazing.

Selvin (00:22:54):

And I always look outside the window and then I would picture myself like, what am I? I started thinking about like, what am I doing outside the window? Am I doing something, you know, good about my life, positive for my life or am I doing something negative in my life ? So you know, that kind of like got to me like man and you know, like once I, once I get out this window, I'm gonna go and know, start doing positive things. So I like, you know what? I'm gonna learn how to manage my time. So I went to the bookshelf, I grabbed the book, bro. I used to read every single night and then like, it'll pray like every night at the end of the day, like after my prayers, I feel good, bro. Like not good or being there at the same time, I feel good there because that's not, you know, I learned my lesson not to go back. Yeah.

Deandre (00:23:33):

I feel like God pushed me this way. God, in this program, dude, without this program, I don't know where I'll be right now. Probably in the streets. I'm telling you right now this time, bro, I'll be outside doing something that I shouldn't be doing. Not in the dorm, not in the dorm. Probably not eating every meal of every day. And I'm telling you, man, be man, like I believe in you, bro.

Selvin (00:23:56)

I believe in you too, man.

Deandre (00:23:57)

We gonna make it bro. We're gonna make it in life, man.

Alex (00:24:06):

You can get over, you know, an injury if somebody's abusive to you. But you know, you can't run from what's inside of you. You can't run from your feelings. I don't know. It's just the emotional damage that I think foster care does is worse than anything else. It's not the fact that you move. It's not the action of it. It's the consequences of moving so much and like why you moved. You know, having families basically say, you know what? Like, we don't want you anymore. And then to go on and try and have any type of relationship, whether it's romantic or if it's just a platonic relationship, it's just, it's difficult because you're so used to having families tell you, they don't want you, you know, things like that. You know, for all of that though, I'm not just gonna sit here and say like that's all foster care is. There are wonderful families in foster care that like really love and adore their kids. And it's like, that's amazing. There needs to be more people like that.

Inlaid Text (00:25:31):

Dangerfield Group Home Los Angeles County

Crystal (00:25:39):

Oh, oh they gave you a receipt.

Alyssa (00:25:42):

Yeah. I need to give this back to them when I go get my phone.

Crystal (00:25:45):

As soon as you get outta school, you come here. See me and then go.

Alyssa (00:25:49):

Just go? Okay.

Crystal (00:25:50):

Yep. So that way I can at least sign you in from school and then sign you stating that you're going over there.

Alyssa (00:25:56):

We got juice?

Crystal (00:25:57):

No, you gonna make it. You can make some tea like you did yesterday. Obviously it was good.

Alyssa (00:26:03):

I have a lot of stuff to do.

Crystal (00:26:09):

The kids are like my kids. They were in situations that were not in their power to control. So they get placed here. And we as caregivers are trying to help them go through and maneuver life as much as possible. We're trying to keep them safe, because that's what being in the group home is supposed to be about. Somebody has to care for them. Their parent might not be capable for whatever reason, but I believe somebody is always here for somebody else. You make your family who you make your family.

Alyssa (00:26:53):

Miss Betty can't cook. She only makes one good, the only thing that I eat that she makes is her jambalaya. I took the leftovers to school today.

Betty (00:27:02):

So who ate the sloppy joes on Sunday? They said you ate those.

Alyssa (00:27:06):

I had one and it was too spicy. What's for dinner?

Betty (00:27:11):

I’m making tostadas. And rolls for tomorrow.

Alyssa (00:27:15):

Ooh Miss Betty. You look real good for your age. Okay. I wish I could say the same about Crystal but…

Crystal (00:27:22):

Hey!

Alyssa (00:27:23):

She's 102.

Crystal (00:27:26):

I’m 52.

Alyssa (00:27:26):

Oh, you're a baby.

Crystal (00:27:28):

Yes I am.

Alyssa (00:27:29):

Like you know that my mom is younger than you?

Crystal (00:27:30):

We wear many hats here. We're like the therapist. We're like the teacher. We're like the mom, the grandmother, the aunt, we're all of that. We try to be like a parent, but we know we're not. And they will bring that up to us where you're not my mom. You can't tell me what to do. No, I'm, we are not trying to, but we are trying to help you to get through life as best as possible while you are here. This is a temporary placement. We're trying to help you get to a situation where when you are on your own you'll know and have some skills to deal with. We do the best we can with what we have. Good evening, Dangerfield. Yes ma'am. This is Crystal. Yes I do. You're Mia’s social worker. Yes ma'am.

Dr. Daphna Oyserman (00:28:48):

Even in 1890, before there was a field of psychology and it was philosophy, William James was talking about this idea of an imagined or possible self. And he felt quite certain that we're motivated not just by who we are right now, but by our images of who we might become. Particularly in risky situations, the other piece that's highly motivating is the self you're afraid you might become. The last set of studies that we did is we said, well, maybe what we're ignoring, the reason that it's sort of messier, is we're ignoring context. And maybe we should take more seriously context. So if I'm in a context where it's reasonably clear that things can go badly and all I'm thinking about is my most desired possible self, is that motivating? And the other mismatch, if I'm in a context where it's likely that things are gonna go fabulously, but all I'm thinking about is how awful my feared possible self would be, is that motivating? And maybe the problem isn't to think about is the positive desired possible self-motivating or is the negative undesired feared possible self-motivating, but rather to say it's about the match between the context that you're in and the way that you're imagining your possible self. And sure enough, that's what we found.

Mia (00:30:11):

I ended up in foster care because my mother is a drug addict. I didn't mean to sound so happy about it because I'm not, but like she's, I have learned to laugh about my experience by the way. So if I tend to laugh, I just, it's already funny to me. So, um, my mom is a drug addict. My biological father is, was abusive. Now he is not, we have talked it out and stuff. And like my, my grandma may she rest her soul, she passed away. But like, she was a drug addict too. I don't talk to my biological mom at all. She's still a drug addict. She's gonna do what she does until the end of her days. She's a drug addict. She would abuse me. And like, um, her boyfriends would like abuse her too. It's like, it happens without you realizing, because at a certain point like, oh, it's not even that bad. Like this whooping doesn't even hurt. Like you'll cry so much and then in between the whooping, you're just like numb. You don't feel anything and you don't, you really don't hear or you don't feel like you're just cut off from the world. And then it's like, they'll be like, oh, you're not crying. Okay, thenI'm gonna hit you more. You're like, okay like it doesn't even hurt. So keep going, like I don't care. And that's how it was. So I've learned to dull out a lot of pain. It's comes naturally now.

Teacher (00:32:24):

Cool. So a couple things, let's try to relax it a little bit more. Be a little, a little more stylized. It was the first time through, but um, think of it, think of it that way. Okay. One, two. Ready?

Inlaid text (00:33:22):

Although a case against her boyfriend ended Alex’s stay at his grandmother’s home, where he had lived since he was three years old, the Department of Children and Family Services (DCFS) allows periodic visits with his grandmother.

Bee (00:33:37):

So how was school this week?

Alex (00:33:40):

It was good. I only, I only went like four. I didn't go Friday.

Bee (00:33:44):

Why?

Alex (00:33:45):

Because I had the full day rehearsal.

Bee (00:33:47):

Oh. Let's see if there's a nice shady spot.

Alex (00:33:56):

Oh yeah. I think there is actually,

Bee (00:34:02):

How am I on that side?

Alex (00:34:03):

You're okay. You're just slanted.

Bee (00:34:07):

Okay.

Alex (00:34:08):

You’re not crossing the line. So a few of the trombones from honor jazz, we're gonna make a trombone quartet and we've already decided on the first song we want to kind of learn it's um, a medley of Les Mis.

Bee (00:34:25):

Of what?

Bee (00:34:26):

Uh, I don't actually know how to pronounce the full thing, but like lay-mis-er-ables?

Bee (00:34:32):

Les Miserables.

Alex (00:34:35):

Oh yeah. There that, um, there's a medley of it.

Bee (00:34:40):

I always think of trombones as being kind of a supporting instrument.

Alex (00:34:45):

They are. And that's why there's trombone quartets so that we can have the melody sometimes.

Bee (00:34:51):

Oh, I see.

Alex (00:34:53):

But it also just depends on what kind of trombone you play. Like if you play a bass trombone, then you're almost always gonna be the support unless there's like a villainy or like a dark part to a song.

Bee (00:35:07):

Well, I told you when I played the violin, I was so awful at it. My parents made me practice in the garage, you know, cuz it was this (screech) it was horrible. Well, grandpa Norman played in the Marine Corps band and uh, he was very good.

Alex (00:35:31):

Yeah.

Bee (00:35:32):

Very, very good. He was a smart man. You come by your brains from your family you know. And Alice is smart. Um, Even your mother's smart, even though she doesn't do smart things.

Alex (00:35:58):

Yeah.

Bee (00:36:01):

One of the nice things about getting older is you get better at accepting things you can't change.

Alex (00:36:11):

Yeah.

Bee (00:36:11):

And, but you have to recognize at first and then accept the fact you can't change it. You have to live with it. Yep. Like I hate being old Al. I never told you that, but I hate it. I wish I were 35 again.

Alex (00:36:34):

Well, you can't do anything about it.

Bee (00:36:35):

No, I can't.

Alex (00:36:37):

I can’t do anything about getting older, so.

Bee (00:36:40):

No, but you're just going into your golden years. Does it feel that way?

Ales (00:36:49):

Not really. No, not at all. It's a lot more stressful.

Bee (00:36:53):

Yea well, we can't pick what we're going to die over or when we're going to die, but I always think of the Woody Allen thing of, I'm not afraid of dying. I just don't wanna be there when it happens. Yeah. And I identify with that.

Alex (00:37:15):

I think everybody does to a certain extent.

Bee (00:37:18):

Yeah. Yeah and we all wanna just go to sleep and never wake up. I mean, it might be a shock to your family.

Alex (00:37:32):

I wouldn't mind being awake. I wouldn't mind being awake because those are like the last moments you get with your family. So I'd, I'd rather spend that with my family, then be asleep when I could have been awake. And I could have had those last few experiences.

Bee (00:37:50):

But what if you were in horrible pain?

Alex (00:38:00):

I mean, I doubt that. I feel like if I was in horrible pain, I would be dead.

Bee (00:38:06):

No. Sometimes it's not like that.

Alex (00:34:03):

I know. Can I go home B? I'm really tired. I wanna go home.

Bee (00:38:12):

You wanna go home?

Alex (00:34:13):

Yes. I'm really tired.

Bee (00:38:15):

I noticed you've been yawning.

Alex (00:34:16):

Yes.

Bee (00:38:27):

Will you go in and take a nap?

Alex (00:38:30):

Probably.

Bee (00:38:32):

Oh, okay. Give me a kiss. I love you.

Alex (00:38:35):

I love you too Bee. Bye. Uh, text me when you get home.

Bee (00:38:40):

Hmm?

Alex (00:38:41):

Text me when you get home.

Bee (00:38:42):

I will. Okay.

Alex (00:38:42):

Thank you.

Alex (00:38:55):

My mom and her siblings were in foster care, and I'm a second generation foster kid. I'm not sure exactly what tipped it off. I do know that my grandmother had an abusive partner and so I just think it hurt her a lot more. Especially since like her first set of kids were put into foster care and like now I'm in foster care and I was like her second chance.

Alex (00:40:20):

I still remember the day that I left. We had just gotten back from the beach. I still had sand in my swim trunks, still had wet hair. And I guess you could call him my uncle, he's my grandmother's boyfriend. He got really upset with me over something like taking out the trash or something and pushed me onto the floor. He hit my head against the wall. And then before he did anything else, he just said, you know what? Go outside. I don't, I don't want to hit you. He had locked me out of the house. I was out there until like nine or ten. Ever since I was a little kid, we had always been arguing, fighting. Basically I had wanted to leave because things had started getting physical and things were emotionally, physically, mentally abusive. That's what they wrote down on the court thing too.

Alex (00:41:31):

And we were sitting down with placement social workers, education people, my therapist. And they said, Alex, would you consider going into a foster home? And I said, yes, please. I don't want to go back to my grandmother's house. I was trying not to cry the whole time, cuz it was really sad to think about like everything. But I realized that it would be good for me. I remember I hadn't had anything to eat since lunch that day. And so I told my social worker about it and he said, all right, let's go to Denny's. And so me and him went to Denny's. I got spaghetti and meatballs and he got some sort of burger. After that he took me straight to the group home.

Inlaid Text (00:42:28):

First Star Talent Show UCLA Campus

Bajing, Mia, Alyssa (00:42:35):

(singing) Do all the things I should have done, when I was your man.

Genieva (00:42:50):

Good evening everyone, good evening. We are gonna be your hosts for tonight. So we're gonna get this started.

Justin (00:43:49):

When I step into the light, my darkness burns away. I'm healed, I'm revealed, and I'm never alone. Together, our demons disappear and our hearts are revealed. Our scars, the embodiments of our struggle are finally real, both ugly and beautiful, our anchors to the past and our strength for the future. We're no longer belted to the world. Together, we can reach for the heavens. Together, we're free.

Shaun (00:44:19):

What's going on at home when you get back?

Karly(00:44:23):

Hmm. Oh, I'm gonna take my mom out. Me and my mom are gonna have a mother daughter day.

Shaun (00:44:31):

What you gonna do?

Karly(00:44:34):

Uh, get her hair done. Our nails done. And then go out to eat. Yeah. I'm gonna treat her to a day out.

Shaun (00:44:45):

How long have you lived with her?

Karly (00:44:47):

Um, three and a half years. Well, I was kind of like in eighth grade when I was put into foster care. Like I got put, I had a social worker before, but they just put me with my sister. And it was because like my mom and my dad, like… I can say like they, um, like they like, were they, it, I, I, it's not a whooping... And uh, like, okay. Like my mom and my dad, like, they like beat me up, but it was like outside in front of the people. Like she just like choked me and like threw me on the floor was like kicking me and stuff. And then, so I ran away from home and like I was with one of my friends for a week. And then I, I went to the police station and then from there I got put into foster care. Um, yeah.

Sue (00:46:10):

Oh, oh my gosh. Look at them, they’re tiny. Ow, its claws.

Veterinarian (00:46:18):

Two of 'em have been adopted already yesterday. And the owners have said they're already purring and doing really well. So it just took, it just takes one day of a lot of attention. Did you say you do have a preference or?

Sue (00:46:29):

No, no.

Veterinarian (00:46:31):

 Okay.

Alex (00:46:32):

The claws are coming out.

Veterinarian (00:46:33):

Then it’s just about looks and personality.

Sue (00:46:34):

Yeah. Yeah. Alex, you hold this one.

Alex (00:46:38):

Okay. No Caesar.

Sue (00:46:44):

It's alright. Let him, let him sniff.

Alex (00:46:47):

Take his leash off.

Sure (00:46:49):

No let’s leave his leash on.

Alex (00:47:01):

I could feel its little heart beating really fast.

Sue (00:47:03):

Yeah. So, smaller the animal the faster the heartbeat.

Veterinarian (00:47:09):

That one seems to be settled right in. That's funny that one's just really,

Alex (00:47:15):

I like this one too.

Sue (00:47:17):

That one’s super mellow. I think he’s gone to sleep on you.

Alex (00:47:22):

You should get one too.

Sue (00:47:24):

Well, I don't know. I mean, look at these dogs. I have to do this all day.

Alex (00:47:37):

When you go to see your girlfriend or your boyfriend's parents, you know, they're, they're not sitting there treating you like, like you're their daughter or you're their son. They're treating you as a guest. And so imagine that feeling 24/7, where you're just constantly a guest sort of like, am I overstaying? Am I, hey, am I a burden right now? Am I acting the way I should act? So that's sort of what foster care is like. But each time it's like, you have to learn a whole new set of rules. You have to learn what people like, what people don't like, how this person acts how this person acts. That's not what family's like though. They're not gonna kick you out for, they might kick you out, but they, they're not gonna kick you out forever. You know, like foster families will like say, you know, if you mess up again, like you're out, you know, but it's like, you know, a real family would never.

Judge Michael Nash (00:48:51):

Judges at each court probably make hundreds of decisions each day impacting children and families from placement decisions to service decisions, to life changing decisions. Things like, should we terminate the rights of this parent forever? There are many unforgettable moments. You remember cases where, I tend to, to like to try and remember cases where something positive happened. But there are cases where children died that haunt you. You think to yourself, is there something I could have done better? Something that I could have done that might have prevented that happening? Did I make the right decision in that case? What am I gonna do the next time I see the scenario? But at the end of the day, I think it's important for all of us to try and remember the good things that happen. And it will be there every single day. Even what you consider to be your worst day on the bench, those positive things will be there. If you can pinpoint those positive things and think, and let that be the last thing you think about before you leave that day, you can come back tomorrow and do it again. When you get to the point where all you're doing is focusing on the negative, then I would say that the chances of burnout are much greater that way.

Inlaid text (00:50:34):

First Star Flash Mob UCLA Campus

Lonnell (00:50:40):

Everybody and their mom is in this place right now.

Justin (00:50:45):

No. Maybe a little bit, but that's not the point.

Angel (00:50:50):

No it’s 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

Mia (00:50:55):

No it’s, don't do it now.

Linda (00:50:57):

You're making me think it’s started already.

Genieva (00:51:00):

I’m scared.

Justin (00:51:01):

So where's the music gonna come from, huh?

Lonnell (00:51:05):

Why don’t we go ask?

 

Andrea (00:51:09):

You know where you’re standing at right? Next to me. You, you, next to me.

Crystal (00:51:48):

All of this is a learning experience. I said we all got our own, and I want them to know that they don't have to be a product of their past. Just because you are not with that family member does not mean you're not loved, does not mean you're not worthy to be loved. Cuz you are more than amazing. You may not know it. You may not see it, but you may inspire somebody else to keep going on with their life because they see what you are doing. And they might know a piece of your story, but they don't know everything. But if they know a piece of your story and a little bit of that gives them hope, then it's all worth it.

News Anchor (00:52:51):

A massive manhunt began early afternoon on this frightening day in San Bernardino as the government…

Crystal (00:53:02):

Aw, you did. See you, you were practicing.

Alyssa (00:53:10):

Can I have a razor? I went and bought everything else but that.

Crystal (00:53:16):

You've been to Target?

Alyssa (00:53:18):

No, I went to, I went to, um, Walmart, Bath and Body Works, Forever 21, then… where else did I go?

Crystal (00:53:33):

You’ve been all over.

Alyssa (00:53:34):

Yeah, I just forgot to buy the razors. That’s pretty stupid but I wasn’t gonna be able to keep them in the room anyways.

Crystal (00:53:40):

No, cause all I’m gonna do is lock em up and put your name on em. How did you,

Alyssa (00:53:47):

I got up early.

Crystal (00:53:50):

I was gonna say how you, I'm used to you getting,

Alyssa (00:53:52):

I know I got up early. I’m going to get my hair done tomorrow.

Crystal (00:53:55):

Are you?

Alyssa (00:53:56):

Yeah, I can't walk around you looking like this.

Crystal (00:53:59):

You sound congested.

Alyssa (00:54:00):

I am! Can you make me something?

Crystal (00:54:05):

Yes, I will make you some tea. Yes, I will.

News Anchor (00:54:07):

…suspect in this mass shooting and the name that we are being given.

Crystal (00:54:13):

I have a lot of 'em that come to see me still. I call 'em all my babies. They my babies, no matter what. They my babies and I tell 'em I'm here. You can be gone 10, 20 years. I'm still here. Call me. Still here. And it's really worth it to see the faces, to see them come back, to see them growing and prospering, to see them with a job. To see them driving down the street in they car and they hollerin’ out. Yes. That, that's a good feeling to know that you can make a difference. They may not get it now, but you know, they taking it in cuz the more resistance you meet with, you know, they listening, they not gonna tell you, but they listening. They listening. As long as I know some of the information that we're putting out there is gonna reach 'em, I don't worry about the rest of it. Cause it'll come. It'll come.

Group (00:55:17):

(singing) Happy Birthday dear Alyssa, happy birthday to you, cha cha cha!

Inlaid text (00:55:29)

Alex’s Eighteenth Birthday

Alan (00:55:32):

Why did you pick her up?

Sue (00:55:34):

Cause I can’t reach her.

Will (00:55:36):

If anyone tries to pick her up, she’s mean,

Sue (00:55:39):

Now I did have a bit of a malfunction with the writing on this cake.

Alex (00:55:43):

It's okay.

Sue (00:55:44):

As you can probably tell,

Alex (00:55:45):

It's better than my writing.

Sue (00:55:47):

Right. You sit down.

Alan, Sue, Will (00:55:48):

(singing) Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Alex, happy birthday to you. (whistles)

Alex (00:56:17):

My mom's in jail again for uh, some really bad stuff. This time, six felonies and four misdemeanors. I was really sad to hear it. Um, cuz honestly like I love my mom, you know? I don't know why cuz she hasn't like, you know, like she wasn't really there in my life. Like she just missed me growing up, but I don't know why I just, I want her to be okay. The love I have for my biological mom is like that biological feeling. It's not that I don't like other people's parents. Like I love other people's parents, you know? But I've never been able to call anybody mom or dad.

Lyndsey Collins Wilson (00:57:29):

When young people have someone to lean on. When they see you as a responsible role model, when they hear you speaking life into them, talking about what's possible, talking about their future. And when that person becomes a consistent fixture in their life, you have single-handedly without even realizing it, probably pivoted that young person's journey to this new reality of what is possible. And it's a blessing. It's a blessing to be able to do that. For young people that sometimes will never have a mom or dad. Even when they get to 35, some of their parents will never come around. They will never figure out their mental health issues. They will never deal with their drug or substance abuse issues. And so that young person has to figure it out on their own. But with that other person who is their mentor, who is speaking positively, who is showing this long lasting love and care for them, you can completely change their life. That's how much consistent adults matter when people have had adverse childhood experiences and trauma after trauma.

First Star Presenter (00:59:01):

Welcome everybody to our graduation celebration for our cohort two students from the First Star Bruin Guardian Scholars Academy. Please rise.

First Star Presenter (00:59:18):

So we’re gonna start off with our first scholar. And he's not here with us today, but it's Alexander Ballantyne. The next student Mia Deriso, please.

Mia (00:59:39):

First and foremost. And I think I told some of y'all, but like when I first got here, I didn't really like any y'all well, no, it gets better. I didn't really like anybody because I'm the type of person like I've been through a lot. So I tend to close off myself to others and I don't like getting hurt. So I don't like to get attached to people. And so as like, the years have progressed, like I got super attached to all y'all and like I consider y'all all my family, but like I really do love all you guys. And honestly, BGSA is the reason I even applied to San Francisco state to attend with Bajing because my GPA started to really decrease cuz I moved into a new foster home. Like everything was really bad. I was like, I'm not gonna get in. There's no point in trying. And I got accepted to two universities plus a scholarship. And that's all because if y'all like, you guys are the reason that I'm progressing and I'm gonna become a biologist. So thank you.

Announcer (01:00:40):

Mia Deriso (cheers), Elizabeth White, Joseph Espinoza… 

Inlaid Text (01:01:00)

Alex missed his high school and First Star graduations to go on tour with the Sacramento Mandarins Drum Corps. Three days after he returned, Alex’s foster family asked him to move out.

Alex (01:01:26):

I hate saying homeless cuz I feel like homeless means living on the streets, but it doesn't. It just means you don't have a home. When I got back from drum corps, I spent the night at my friend Sam's house. I just forgot to tell Sue. And next morning I got a phone call from her saying like, do you even like respect the rules or anything? Like, and it was like, what? Like I didn't come home past 11. I'm sorry. I didn't tell you. And then I just got this long text from Alan and basically saying that they felt like they weren't appreciated and that I had a week to move out. And then later that day they said all your stuff's in the garage. Come get it.

Shaun (01:02:18):

Well, she said that you were smoking pot and that that was a problem.

Alex (01:02:23):

They said that they said that they thought I was drinking and smoking?

Shaun (01:02:27):

They wrote it in an email.

Alex (01:02:31):

All they told me was that I was being disrespectful and all I said was okay, you know, I didn't know anything.

Shaun (01:02:41):

Yeah.

Alex (01:02:42):

And you know, to know that is just like a huge kick in the stomach, I guess, cuz it's like, I wasn't even the kid doing that, you know?

Shaun (01:02:53):

Right.

Alex (01:02:53):

When I was there I felt so, so held back like them saying, I can't do, like, I wanted to be a scientist. I wanted to be a physicist. You know, that was my dream. And I really felt like I could have done that, you know. But they told me I couldn't, like I wasn't smart enough, like I wasn't chasing it hard enough.

Shaun (01:03:15):

They said that?

Alex (01:03:17):

Yeah. Sue told me, like I kept telling her, you know, this is what I want to do. And she just kept telling me, no, you can't do that. Like if you really wanted to do that, you would've been doing it since like sixth grade. And I just, I just felt like I was so held back, you know? And to think that, that I let other people tell me that I couldn't do something. Who knows, maybe I would've loved science. Maybe I would've loved physics. Maybe I really would've done something like that. You know? How do you tell the people that are taking care of you and how do you tell the people that you look up to? Hey, you know what, you're wrong? I can do it. Whether or not, you know you like, how are you supposed to do that?

Shaun (01:04:16):

I dunno.

Alex (01:04:18):

And then, and then to find out that they thought I was drinking and doing drugs when I wasn't their kid doing that, you know, It wasn't even me. And to think that after the three years that we had been living together, that they couldn't just talk to me about something like that. You know, It was just…

Inlaid Text (01:05:06):

Alex’s foster family moved out of California and decided to stop participating in the documentary. After moving, Alex spent more time with his biological family. He asked Mike, his grandmother’s boyfriend, to give him a tattoo.

Mike (01:05:53):

Here we go.

Shaun (01:06:16):

Mike, do you mind if I ask you a question while you’re working?

Mike (01:06:18):

Go ahead. I’ll do my best to answer.

Shaun (01:06:22):

Well, you mentioned that when Alex showed up things changed. I was wondering what changed when Alex came into the picture?

Mike (01:06:33):

Well, it amounted to more responsibilities. We knew Al was a broken child. Al had been abandoned by both his parents. And I feel bad for introducing his parents. I picked up where they failed. I took it personal because I'm the one that introduced them. It wasn’t his fault. Poor kid, you know? He got burned. It wasn't fair. And Uncle Michael did what Uncle Michael does, fixes things. It was all good. I was raising Mike. I was raising my son. No problem. One more mouth. I had a job at time. I didn’t think twice about it. It needed to be done. But at the time I, you know, I was barely figuring out my life in my thirties. I was an idiot growing up, drug addict, alcoholic, you know, prison most of my teenage years. And matter of fact, that's where I learned this. That's exactly where I learned this. And um, so when the, when the time came to adopt Al there wasn't, there was no, there was no second guessing that needed to be done. It needed to be done. We had no idea DCFS was gonna treat us so bad. They made it so difficult for us, for me because of my background. They put me under the microscope.

Mike (01:08:13):

Let me see your dragon. We're gonna touch that up too.

Shaun (01:08:33):

What got DCFS involved?

Mike (01:08:37):

Accusations, Accusations. They accused me of child abuse. And it wasn't true. That wasn't right. Luckily the judge saw it and the bad thing about it, Al spent a lot of time in foster care.

Alex (01:09:15):

Yeah.

Mike (01:09:16):

But it's done. It's done, as in done it’s the past, we survived it. You're here, you know?

Alex (01:09:25):

Yeah.

Mike (01:09:26):

The past is the past. All we can do is prove 'em wrong. DCFS had to do what they felt was appropriate. I feel they misjudged me. And as a result, you paid for it.

Alex (01:09:45):

Yeah.

Mike (01:09:47):

Luckily now you, you know, you are gonna be going to college. I couldn't offer you that.

Alex (01:09:54):

Yeah.

Mike (01:09:55):

I'm struggling to keep a house, keep a roof over our head. I'm struggling to keep Bee alive. Enough, enough about that.

Alex (01:10:06):

Yeah.

Mike (01:10:07):

Yeah. I think we're done with that one.

Alex (01:10:27):

It helps not to look.

Shaun (01:10:29):

Really?

Alex (01:10:30):

Yeah. A little bit.

Shaun (01:10:31):

Yeah.

Alex (01:10:32):

So I got the bumblebee cuz growing up, I didn't know how to say my grandma's name. Um, so I just started calling her Bee.

Mike (01:10:43):

And that’s where she got, the name stuck…

Alex (01:10:45):

Yeah, the name, I guess just stuck.

Mike (01:10:47):

The name stuck. That's exactly what happened.

Inlaid Text (1:11:03):

San Francisco State University

Mia’s Foster Father (01:11:07):

This one can be standing here.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:11:14):

Yeah. Put it here.

Mia (01:11:17):

My parents they're like strict in their own way.

Mia (01:11:21):

I’m like having struggles. I dunno how you're doing this.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:11:25):

Slow but steady.

Mia (01:11:27):

Like they discipline, but they let you make your mistakes so then you realize what you can do to fix them. And cuz my mom's young, like she's a young mom, you know? And like, I feel like she just understands. Like my dad, like he is the joke with you kind of person like teach me how to drive. I sit on their bed. I talk to them and I can just cry and everything's fine. As a foster, you don't come around that often. You don't find that a lot, you know.

Bajing (01:12:05):

Mia! Hey! Oh my gosh. Oh, come on.

Mia (01:12:12):

I’m tryna get the key out the door.

Bajing (01:12:14):

Here, let me help you. Let me help you. Is this all your stuff?

Mia (01:12:24):

Yeah.

Mia (01:12:26):

Hi.

Bajing (01:12:14):

I'm gonna wait for someone. So just yeah. I’ll help her.

Mia (01:12:36):

Oh is this?

Bajing (01:12:38):

Yeah. Look at first they had, okay

Mia (01:12:39):

Oh you got a lot of stuff.

Bajing (01:12:40):

Yeah. Do you?

Mia (01:12:43):

Um, yea I do.

Bajing (01:12:45):

And they, they gave us stuff, stuff over there.

Mia (01:12:47):

What’s this?

Bajing (01:12:49):

It’s just pillows. Yeah.

Mia (01:12:55):

Oh, a goodie bag. Bro, I dunno what to do.

Bajing (01:13:00):

Yeah. It took me a while to know where to start. I started, when did I start on? I started putting my stuff in the closet, like hanging stuff up and then I went to my clothes, to my bed and then to like little objects and stuff.

Mia (01:13:12):

Okay.

Bajing (01:13:15):

Is somebody else in here?

Mia (01:13:16):

My dad probably.

Bajing (01:13:17):

Oh, okay.

Mia (01:13:20):

Is it?

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:13:21):

Where is she?

Bajing (01:13:22:

Up in here, yes.

Mia’s Foster Father (01:13:27):

One, two and three. We’re taking off, okay? You take care of yourself. Good luck.

Mia (01:13:37):

Okay, bye.

Mia’s Foster Father (01:13:37):

Anything you can text us or anything?

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:13:39):

Text us, okay? If, once you finish your supplies or whatever your social worker doesn't get back to you, call us.

Mia (01:13:44):

Okay.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:13:45):

Text me. And don't waste your money on things that you don't need. Don't go crazy with your money.

Mia (01:13:50):

I won’t.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:13:51):

If, if you need to start saving money, please do.

Mia (01:13:56):

Okay.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:13:57):

Don't touch your money that you don't need. Don't let your friends, don't be Mother Therea. Okay? Like you always are. Okay.

Mia (01:14:07):

I’m not, I'm not gonna cry. Deuces.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:14:14):

You're gonna be fine.

Mia’s Foster Father (01:14:18):

You're flying solo now.

Mia (01:14:24):

I’m trying not to cry. I don’t wanna go.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:14:32):

Okay. You're gonna be okay. You're gonna be fine. Go, see you're gonna go through this list.

Mia’s Foster Father (01:14:41):

You’re gonna be fine. Anything, you know, you can text, you know, you can count on us.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:14:46)

It’s like last time, remember?

Mia’s Foster Father (01:14:47)

Go to your dorm, go have fun with your roommate, fix your room. You got a lot to do over there. Don’t cry. Come on. What's wrong.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:14:56):

You got this.

Mia’s Foster Father (01:14:57)

Be smart, stay strong. Okay?

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:14:59):

Right. Gotta go. Cause then I'm gonna get a ticket and I'll send you the ticket.

Mia’s Foster Father (01:15:04):

All right, Mia.

Mia’s Foster Mother (01:15:05):

Just keep walking. Don't look back.

Mia (01:15:06):

Love you.

Mia’s Foster Father (01:15:07):

Keep walking. Don't don't look back. Okay again. Right? Okay. Okay.

 

Mia (01:15:12):

Love you too. Okay. All right.

Mia’s Foster Father (01:15:17):

Don't look back. Mia! We love you. Okay?

Mia (01:15:38):

Okay. Let's go. I don’t wanna be here. I don’t want to.

Mia (01:16:24):

Where are you guys going?

Bajing (01:16:25):

Aw. We're gonna go look at our classes. I was crying, too.

Mia (01:16:27):

I don't even know where my classes are.

Bajing (01:16:29):

You wanna come?

Mia (01:16:30):

I have nothing better to do. My parents abandoned me.

Bajing (01:16:35):

Okay. We're all going to find our classes. All right. My first class, I have to go to 283, but right now we're going to 101 through 1 0 8. So whatever number you have for, okay I have 107.

Inlaid Text (01:16:54)

After months of moving around, Alex was accepted into a transitional housing program.

Alex (01:16:58):

So I'm in a transitional housing program, which is something for foster youth. It assists them with living if they don't have a legal guardian taking care of them.

Alex (01:17:08):

Gosh, I need to dust. You know, I never believed adults when they’re like, you gotta dust. But you really do. Look how sweet this plate is and it was so dusty. It says “you make the world a better place just by being in it.” So I'm starting college after a year of not going to school, I'm starting my major in music.

Alex (01:17:43):

Okay. We’re good.

Alex (01:17:46):

Well I'm excited for school in all honesty, excited to be around music again. I'm excited to just be able to play. I haven't really just been able to relax and like practice for a while. Musicianship, wind ensemble and then music theory. And that's what we got going on today. After I got kicked out of the Fishers’, I like just lost my focus, you know. Over the better half the year, I could say I've been depressed and I've gained a lot of weight. It was rough. And I guess it still is. Yeah, I know. It's like, it's supposed to be the end. Like, let's go happy, go lucky. You know? But this isn't the end of my story. This just happens to be where I start school.

Alex (01:18:45):

All right. It's first day of school and uh, we're seven minutes away. Kind of nervous. Okay. Well traffic. Yay. But it's okay. Cuz I'm actually going to school this time. All right. But we're here. I'm excited. I'm still very, uh it's a little weird after like a year of no school.

Shaun (01:19:10):

Yeah.

Alex (01:19:11):

I know, I keep saying that, but it's like, I'm excited though.

Shaun (01:19:18):

All set.

Alex (01:19:19):

You're all set? You're waiting on me?

Shaun (01:19:21):

Oh you know, not waiting.

Alex (01:19:23):

Well I, okay.

Shaun (01:19:26):

Ready?

Alex (01:19:27):

Okay. Yeah.

Shaun (01:19:30):

I’ll follow you.

Alex (01:19:31):

I guess I'm as ready as I can be. Oh boy. Okay. Let's go. Life is about being out of your comfort zone. Here we go.

Inlaid Text (01:20:10):

Only 50% of American foster youth graduate from high school. Of children who reach adulthood while in foster care, 24% will experience homelessness by the time they turn 25. 64% of men and 32% of women will have been incarcerated by the time they turn 25. Only 3% will graduate from college.

End Credits (01:21:02)

Final Song Lyrics

Hush my troubled mind and rest

I need to breathe and clear my head

Shut my eyes and dream of things

I could have done much differently

 

Wait for me now

I might come around I might come around to this

Find common ground

Before we lose our heads

Before we scrub our minds in bliss

 

I told you once I’ll tell you twice

you have my heart until I die

Built up with love torn down by pride

A family made from a new design

 

Wait for me now

I might come around I might come around to this

Find common ground

Before we lose our heads

Before we scrub our minds in bliss

 

The best is yet to come

At least you’re both still young

That’s what they said to us

But my God what have we done