WEBVTT

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[sil.]

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There are more than 43

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million Americans with disabilities.
They represent almost 20 percent of the

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population. Yet many people feel
uncomfortable in their presence.

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Disabled citizens face barriers
of fear and misunderstanding.

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To tell you about myself,
I\'m on the Jerry\'s kids.

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[sil.]

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Longer cheer you go, serious kids. What

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You\'re about to see all experts from the
performance by San Francisco\'s Access

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to Comedy troop. Unlike the
White Flower Day at Macy\'s

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as when I get together a
gang of disfigured people...

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[sil.]

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We go hang out at the makeover counter.

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They use humor to build the bridges between
people who are disabled and those who are not.

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Drive some just crazy.

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Where I\'m the kinda guy who likes
to wheel around... I\'m never

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in one place I\'m rolling all
round and when I see some girls

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that I would like to meet, I\'ll write up up
my hand and then, she falls right on my seat

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because I\'m a wheelchair man. Well, some
of you who may not know me might be

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kinda curious about what my disability is.
You kinda wonder what happened to me.

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I wind up in the wheelchair and so on and neither
I\'m telling you. It\'s not your goddam business.

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I think things would be different and
perhaps would change a little faster

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if people, instead of like thinking
well, jeez, I\'m isn\'t that

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too bad. That really makes me feel better and I\'m
glad that it didn\'t happened to me and then,

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putting it out of their minds. If they just stop for a minute
and thought about well, you know, maybe they are not any

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different from me. When you go around
in a wheelchair in the public,

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it seems inevitable that people come
up to you and say really weird stuff

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and a lot of \'em have what I would call
Paul Lynn sort of smile like someone put

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a vice grip on their nipple.

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You handicapped people are so amazing.

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You have such courage and you\'re such an
inspiration to the rest of us, ah, ah,

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ah! I mean, if that had happened
to me, I would kill myself,

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ah, ah! Every time I see
one of you people, I say

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they went for the Gaze of God go eye.
Do you mind if I ask

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you how you became crippled? No, not all. Do
you mind if I fill your shorts with sushi?

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I mean, I think that\'s part of the thing
with able body people\'s reactions to us

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is that they... the
invulnerability becomes an issue.

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They can\'t think straight because they got
so much distress around disabled people.

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Life is crazy. I mean, I look out in the
world and what I see is crouches...

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[sil.]

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Uhm, and booties. I mean that\'s just

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the level I\'m at crouches and booties.
There are

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advantages to being a wheelchair. One thing is
no matter where you\'re, you always got a seat.

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Perhaps, I use it for last 20 years.

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You always win at musical chairs.
People have said

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that you know, it really made them
uncomfortable when they first saw me

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being lifted on to the stage and they didn\'t
know what to expect, but that after I

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started doing few jokes, they realized that
it was okay to laugh. It just made them feel,

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you know, more comfortable with the
whole idea of socializing with

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the disabled people or you know, actually

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looking at them instead of looking away.
Because I\'m a wheelchair man

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and I wheel around, I wheel around, around,
around. Everybody is saying around, around,

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that\'s enough. Stuttering is like God\'s

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message. Being cool is not gonna
be one of your natural talents.

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When you\'re young, you know, you can

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have a day. You know, when you
hardly stutter it at all,

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you know, when you think
yourself oh, god, you know,

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maybe I\'m cured. You know,
and then, the next day,

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you can\'t get a word out here twice.
So, there

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is this emotional roller coaster.
When John Reever said \"Can we

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talk?\", I took it personally.

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But people often ask me what\'s
it like on the inside to

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stutter, what\'s it feel like?
Well, it\'s like

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having a witty wonderful retort in a

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conversation. And of course, you know,
to put it in the conversation...

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[sil.]

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Makes sense doesn\'t?

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Five words, five words, Ideally
I like to get him a row.

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[sil.]

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The first two words come flying
out just as easy as your pleased.

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Boy, on the inside, I\'m
thinking wow, boy, I\'m

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powerful, I\'m potent, things
are going well. Well, maybe,

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I was too overconfident. That
third word comes the bale

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and through halfway into the mile,
it\'s turns into a height a bit.

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[sil.]

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Flips open and start for
rocking back and forward.

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How you talk, it becomes, you
know, the most important

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thing in your life. When you\'re talking

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well, you know, you feel good about
yourself, you feel powerful.

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And when you\'re not talking well,
you\'re... you\'re lying me. You\'re...

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You hate yourself because
that\'s embarrassing

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and it\'s humiliating. I used
to lie when I can wonder why

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god would make people that stuttered.
Finally,

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one night it occurred to me. Well, of
course, he made people that studded

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just to tick off those Type A personality.

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[sil.]

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You know that type, don\'t you? They\'ve
got 50 things going on at once,

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a little stuttering is going
to really slow them down.

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[sil.]

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Have you ever seen a conversation between
a stutter and a Type A personality?

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It\'s an ugly thing to watch.

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Blood begins to drain out of their face

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as they are waiting for me
to answer their questions

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realizing that they could be completing 15

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to 20 things off there to do that.

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And I feel their tension. I mean,
I\'m intuitive. They make me

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so nervous. I start to talk slower.

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[sil.]

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And that\'s when they begin
to complete my senses

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and this bothers me. I mean, it\'s

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politically incorrect, isn\'t it?
That\'s when I

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say \"Well, Bob that wasn\'t what

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I was going to say,

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even though it was\".

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[sil.]

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Finally, I\'d like to tell you
about my favorite stutterer

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who has inspired me a lot,
his name is John Wayne.

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Maybe, some of you

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did know that John Wayne
was a stutterer. He was

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and he gave the following
advice to a young man that

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stuttered. He said \"If

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you talk like this,

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you don\'t have a problem\".

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[sil.]

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And that\'s exactly

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where my uncanny natural sense of...

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[sil.]

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Comic

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timing come from.

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[sil.]

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Being dyslexic, I see things backwards
are scrambled. You might say

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my life is like a joke, but
the punch line comes first.

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I never read I was in like Junior
High, so I just... they just said

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I had a problem, they didn\'t actually give it a
word. Webster says dyslexia is the impairment

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of the ability to read or the loss of
the ability to read correctly. At least

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I think that\'s right. I had
never been able to keep a job

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and it wasn\'t like something I wanna talk about
somebody. And I was in like oh, hey... I\'m dyslexic,

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I\'m cool. It was like I\'m dyslexic and
I hate you \'coz you\'re not. How many

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dyslexics would have changed
to take a light bulb?

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I want people to laugh, they\'re not
laughing at us, they are laughing with us

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in recognition of things that are happening
in their own lives. None of us make

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fun of ourselves. We make fun of our
situations. I\'ll write something

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down. I\'ll come back later and it\'s
like my evil twin has been there.

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One, that\'s a member, that\'s a ton of quote
that writes everything down backwards.

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I was born with this face,

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it\'s a gift from god, not the kind of
gift that you rip open and say, it\'s

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exquisite. How did you know that I wanted?
It\'s more like

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the kind of gift where you say
\"Oh, god, you shouldn\'t have\".

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People who are facially
disfigured tend to hide

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and want to be anonymous.

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That\'s hard to get that anonymity
when you\'re facially disfigured.

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They usually don\'t talk about my
face in public. The theory is it

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that nobody have noticed. But
I\'ll talk about it tonight,

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but I\'ll need a little encouragement. What
I want this for, you know, when I count

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to three and point, I want you to just
asking a conversational tone that

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question \"What happened to your face?\".
Can you do that?

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One, two, three.

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Four people asking me, it\'s great. Nothing.

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Why?

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I know that\'s not very sincere.

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Actually, a lot happened to my face.
What you see

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on the left side of my face
here is called a hemangioma.

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It\'s basically swelling blood vessels on
the left side of my face, neck and throat.

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It is hemangioma, hemangioma.

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I would say...

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I had one bad experience that I really
remember. When I was at a, chocolate center,

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where I wandered down the
hall and these group of about

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four-year old boys attacked
me, calling me, a monster,

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a monster and they were coming at me,
trying to kill me essentially. And

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it\'s just like oh, really
flipped me out. I\'m gonna

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call that fascinoma. That\'s a
medical term for someone that

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doctors are fascinated by. And

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after all of these medical procedures, we all going
to be the same, it\'s like filling the blanks.

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It\'s like \"Well, Roche, what we\'re
going to do today is take this cold

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metal thing with rough
edges and place it in

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some body part of yours that has
tender mucous membranes and

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lots of nerve endings and leave
it there for about half a

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day. Everybody once in a while will

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rotate it. There may be some discomfort.

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That\'s right or relax.

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Radiation therapy, those
two rods, you know,

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seem to go together exactly very well.
You know, I know radiation

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has helped a lot of people but once you
think that six people will go to Chernobyl

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instead of Lords if radiation was so great.

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Who I feel friendship with
is... actually is physically

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attractive women who had really typified
a lot by their physical appearance.

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Now, women of course have to deal with
appearances, use a lot more than men do,

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like around body image
kinds of things. Now,

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my girlfriend, she tells me I\'m
handsome and I really like that.

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She says \"Actually, if you\'re a
disfigured person, you\'re awfully vein\".

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[sil.]

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And that\'s true. So many things happened.

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I was in Macy\'s. Yes, follow a day
with Marilyn shopping for a shirt.

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She said \"You can\'t have
that shirt, the arms are

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too long for you, your arms are too short for that kind of
shirt\". And I thought I had this horrible realization after

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three years together, I thought \"Three years,
she isn\'t carrying about my face, but she\'s

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disgusted by my stubby arms\".
We know, not everybody

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can be disfigured, but we all have two or three
body parts that we keep under the cover.

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You\'re probably thinking \"What your
disfigured people want anyway?\".

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I\'ll tell you what I want. Now, Lene
is out of town, I want you to tell me

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that I\'m handsome, will you do that? I\'ll
tell you how. I\'ll count a three and point,

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I want you to be sincere, okay? I want
you to convince me. I want you to say

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Oooh are you? You\'re cute, okay?
One, two, three.

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One more time.

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You\'re exquisite. How did you know
what I wanted? Thank you very much.

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I\'m blind. The world\'s blind.
Get it straight.

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Say it often, give money.

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People say \"Oh, is there anything
that we can do?\". Buy me a

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house, that would... I have given
speaks to corporate executives,

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you know, ask them a question that purposely
have this response to. I\'ll ask them

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something like \"How many of you drive your own car
here today?\". And they\'ll all raise their hands.

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Now, what\'s scary about this? Corporate
America is raising the hands to a blind guy.

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This is Fahrvergnügen.

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[sil.]

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I named him Fahrvergnügen because I found
out if you feed him and you don\'t walk him,

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that\'s what he leaves around
the house, giant piles of

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Fahrvergnügen. Oh, sure, you\'re laughing.
But, you know, it\'s like to try and

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clean this stuff up when you\'re blind.
Would you guys like to see him do a trick?

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Me too. Last Friday night,

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I hosted a stand-up comedy night
at my old high school and I got

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paid 300 dollars. This is the high school
that I got suspended from, I got caught using

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drugs in, they told me \"I\'d never amount to
anything\". On my 18th birthday, they took me to

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a nude beach. It was my

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first time. It was great. I loved it. You
know, I accepted after two 12 packs of beer,

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took three and form comps to
convince me there wasn\'t a beach.

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Here, I was in the buff, running
through the Golden Gate Park,

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four and an hour and a half.
I couldn\'t see, I

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needed a lot of help and asked somebody to show me
where the bathroom was and they say \"Yes, sure Mike,

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we\'ll show you \", and then, say in the back\" What Mike
doesn\'t know is we\'re secretly placing him into the

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girls\' bathroom, let\'s sit back and
watch the fun start\". And I go into

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the girls\' bathroom thinking I was going into the
guys\' bathroom and the girls screamed and I come

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running out and I\'d always find the kid that put me in their
cause I was gonna beat him up, I wasn\'t gonna take that kind of

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abuse from any punk small minded kids
and I got a lot of fights and it was

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pretty hard and pretty traumatic. You know what it\'s
like to buy condoms when you\'re blind, you can\'t just

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go in and sneak off the shelf and hide them
between tooth paste and the dental floss.

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You actually have to go and ask for \'em and of course,
wouldn\'t you know when I get to the counter and I

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have got the only box of condoms in the whole store.
It doesn\'t have the price printed right on it.

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Price check,

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price check on TROJAN 12

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pack,

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extra small.

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These three women lined behind me started

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laughing. I had to turn around and
say \"Hear for the dog, okay?\".

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My girlfriend is the most sexually
satisfied woman on the planet, not this

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planet, uhm, uhm. When I talked
about being in the wheelchair,

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I talk about the things that are...
About wheelchair accessibility, about

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people and the attitudes
and about my attitude

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because I like the way I amd at the front.
I rode over here on the bus.

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I know it wouldn\'t be a good trip \'coz the driver
leans back and says \"You wanna me to strap you in?\".

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Now, I would rather where that
being down the aisle for a while.

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Get to know

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everybody here. And you know,
just to arrive the buses mere

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people with wheelchairs, we went down and
we protested. We chained ourselves to the

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bus stops. They arrested us all, took
them through... along power skip

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paddy wagons with special whips, ah, ah.
But you know,

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once they got us down the jail, John
Bias came in and bailed us all out,

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which is... it\'s nice of her except we had
to listen to her sing for 200 minutes.

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[sil.]

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Kum by ya, my lord!

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Well, God, can I do the time?
Is that possible?

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When I do the Access to Comedy Show,

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the audience laughs in such a
different way. You know, it\'s not a

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cheering or a victory thing. It\'s like an

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acknowledgement. It\'s a
very immediate and a very

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recognizable acceptance.
I really that being a

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community, does it come out here? You know,
meet people and put a smile on your face.

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And it\'s a great way to work out
this community service hours.

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Ah, ah,

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I figure out I got six commercials.
I get that derive at totally up my

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record. Did you know that I
can arrest you for that now?

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Drunk, driving in wheelchair
like I have got all the options.

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You know, what am I supposed
to do, crawly there.

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What\'s that, that\'s too, he is drunk again.
Oh, I thought there was a speed

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bump. If you\'re drunk

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and you\'re driving in electric
wheelchair, life becomes a giant pinball

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machine. It can get really diced man.
I\'ve racked up 20,000

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points. I\'m just trying to
get through the doorway

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if you count extra, ah, ah, ah!

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It\'s a... you know, step by
step thing play. At least,

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it\'s 250 people that understand
a little bit better. You know

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and I mean it\'s... they do too I
mean... then, they wanna hang out

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with you because they know that they
don\'t have to feel guilty or ashamed

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of what they have. I went
to the Tennessee other day,

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put a film in inside my tooth, started
picking up vibrations from my wheelchair.

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All day long, I can hear this sound
inside my head, wee right turn, wee

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left turn, wee kill your family, wee, wee.

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As long as this

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is not probably grounded, you can bring
down DC tents and that\'s a fact.

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I can remember my wheelchair life. When I
first got it, I gotta tell you, I felt so

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damn good inside like I can
do anything, I can be anyone,

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go anywhere I will run it. So, I went down
to the movies and the guy wouldn\'t let me in

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because he told me my wheelchair
would block aisle and create a fire

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hazard. That\'s where the man if you don\'t let
me in, you can have little than a fire to worry

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about because I\'m gonna to sue you for
discrimination. So, he let me in.

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He even gave me a free butter
popcorn just to shut me up. But the

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point is that people are going to give a hard
time because whoever you\'re, you\'re too self and

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everybody else to tell \'em I was sticking.
Thank you very much. Have a good night.

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The discrimination that
disabled people suffer from is

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so deeply rooted in the
psyche of culture that

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people don\'t even realize that it\'s
prejudice. Since this program, Kenneth

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Littleton Crow has appeared in television
commercials and played Macbeth.

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I don\'t walk up there with an
idea you know that I\'m going to,

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ah, be educational or

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inspirational, but if I\'m... I
mean, if I\'m satisfying myself,

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I think certain things happened. Joel
Rutledge has lectured across the country

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on the importance of celebrating our individual
differences. Cause you see those comedians

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on that stage and I\'m feeling sorry for
themselves. They\'re feeling really good

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about themselves and hey, this is my life.
Alexis McGuire performs in night

00:25:05.000 --> 00:25:09.999
clubs and teaches in a comedy
traffic school. We all have

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scars and difficult things to deal with. I
can\'t escape my... god knows I\'ve tried.

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David Roche stars in his own one
man show and produces videos on

00:25:20.000 --> 00:25:24.999
issues of facial disfigurement. You can
have all the wheelchair, curb cuts,

00:25:25.000 --> 00:25:29.999
prail, elevators, guide dogs,
laser canes, sign language,

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TDDS, television sets that print
out the words, you can have

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all the accessible stuff in the world. But
until you can break down people\'s attitudes,

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that stuff is going to matter that much.
Mike Lee is a motivational speaker. His

00:25:45.000 --> 00:25:49.999
diverse audiences include school children,
prison inmates and corporate executives.

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I\'m the underdog. I\'m the ultimate
underdog. I\'m the smallest

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and I\'m the weakest and
yet, I know what that is

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going against your life. Shortly
after our interview, Benjamin Stuart

00:26:05.000 --> 00:26:09.999
died of natural causes. He was
27 years old. This program

00:26:10.000 --> 00:26:14.999
is dedicated to Stu with
memories of laughter.

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Very depressing thing to find
out that most buildings aren\'t

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accessible except jail, you know.
It\'s quite remarkable.

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He\'s got a price if I need one. I ran
to this place, the other day called

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the new age supermarket. They don\'t have
pictures of kids on the milk cartons.

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They got pictures of people trying to find
themselves. If I had a nice wheelchair,

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you know, I didn\'t. You know that\'s kinda cool,
but then I get out and the sky swirling up to me.

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Brand new wheel chair or electric
wheelchair. I also got a little desktop

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computer or a cellular caller phone
on it man. This guy known to

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come up to me and say \"Excuse me,
do you have any great coupon?