WEBVTT

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I wasn\'t at the crime scene.

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I wasn\'t the shooter.

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But I was just as responsible

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for that life being taken.

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And I live with that every day.

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I was 18 years old

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going to school

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and met an older man

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36 years old.

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I didn\'t have any friends, um

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I didn’t know how to socialize
or interact with other people.

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I started sniffing a
little cocaine, and LSD.

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Did a little heroin.

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And I think that was more

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to numb myself from the
life that I was living.

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My mom has been living
with me for two years.

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When my mom has said

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don\'t tell anybody about it.

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You can go and live your life

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and get married and have kids

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and no one will ever have to know.

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And I just feel like that would
be the wrong thing to do.

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I want people to know.

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All of these days are over.

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I am formerly incarcerated.

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Um, I spent twenty-two and
a half years in prison.

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And that was a large part of my life.

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The night that the crime happened,

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my boyfriend had come to me told
me what my role was going to be.

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I was to go out into the
streets and stop a car and

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they would be waiting to rob him.

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But reassured me that no
one was going to be hurt.

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Convinced me that my role was minimal.

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A car stopped and asked me,

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\"are you working?\" and I said \"yes\"

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and he said, um, \"how much for oral sex?\"

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And I think I said ten dollars,

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and he was like, \"great, get in.\"

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I felt this feeling in my stomach
like something was wrong.

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I wanted to say, \"don\'t go in,”

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but I didn\'t.

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As soon as he parked, my
co-defendants were there,

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pulled me out of the car and I ran.

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Later learned that he was shot,

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and then died three days later.

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I was scared. I was
hearing what happened um,

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and I knew that was me.

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I knew that was us.

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And, so the next day is when
I went with the police,

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I turned myself in.

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Because I didn\'t kill anyone,
I didn’t shoot anyone.

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I didn\'t think, you know, I
was in a lot of trouble.

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Um, you know, I thought, OK,
I\'d tell them what happened,

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and they\'ll understand.

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I was sentenced to 17 years to life.

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I felt alone. Totally alone.

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When I think about my life before prison,

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The drugs.

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Abusive boyfriend.

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Dropped out of high school.

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There wasn\'t gonna be a happy ending.

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I don’t think I would have survived

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if I didn’t go to prison.

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The destruction would have continued.

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While in prison I earned

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a Bachelors Degree in Behavioral Science

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and a Masters Degree in Literature.

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I raised a dog there

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to become a guiding eye for the blind.

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So, It allowed me to love and be loved,

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be needed and to need.

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Exodus is that place to say, you know what,

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I did, as Diana would say,
twenty two and a half years,

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but I\'m not that person.

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I\'m not twenty two and a half years,

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I\'m not the worst moment of my life.

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We don\'t want to commit crimes.

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We don’t want to go back to prison.

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Good morning.

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Good morning. Good morning.

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Thank you for being here,
and for being part of this

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and for wanting to learn more about Exodus.

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We work with men and women

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who are coming home from prison.

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We think going home

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is gonna to be great,

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that promised land

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we\'ve been thinking about it,
we’ve been dreaming about it,

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But coming home it’s still not that easy.

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And my whole history was in prison.

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From eighteen to forty-one,
that’s all I knew.

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I’ve been home four and a half years

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and there’s still those struggles.

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There’s the conflicts with the families.

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There’s still trying to get
the job and keep the job.

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Knowing somebody who’s going
to help you through that,

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so that we don’t commit crimes again,

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so we don’t go back on the streets

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so that we are not hanging
out with the same people.

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Because that’s what we want.

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We want everybody to stay home.

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And I remember when I
first got that question

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you know, \"How does it feel?\"

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And I didn\'t want to answer it.

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And I was like \"How does what feel?\"

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And even though I knew
what he wanted to hear,

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I didn\'t want to say it, I just felt bad.

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And he was like \"How does freedom feel?\"

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and I was like \"It just feels wonderful.\"

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And his face lit up and
he was like \"I knew it\"

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and the thought of it now... Um.

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And I didn\'t want to deny that to him,

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I didn\'t want him to not know
that it does feel wonderful.

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I\'m a sports guy so I’m always
looking for key acquisitions.

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Who can I get that can
really help Exodus grow?

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And Diana was

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my Lebron James.

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She is the embodiment of
what I want Exodus to be.

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Strong, tough

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yet forgiving.

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Once you\'ve been incarcerated for so long,

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to breathe the air,

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to walk through central park,

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To look at just everyday life happening

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when you\'ve been locked
up 10, 15, 20 years,

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can be the most rewarding and
exciting thing one can imagine.

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Ah Julio, this is the parking lot.

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I wasn’t even here and I feel it.

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You know what I’m saying.

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It does seem so long ago.

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A whole life time ago.

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I would love to say a prayer if possible.

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Lord God we thank you for um, just

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for being able to be here at the moment

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and thank Diana for her
strength and all that she does.

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And may we never forget

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someone did lose a life here.

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We are terribly sorry.

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May we move forward with our lives

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knowing that we do everything
we can today to honor

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not only the victim of this
crime, but the many victims that

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suffered at our hands

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of people that are coming home from prison.

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In your precious name we pray.

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Amen.